Easter Eve

The truth is I need to be doing the dishes, but first this... I have really been struggling lately, for who knows why...but I think that that ol' prince of darkness knows when I am at my weakest and goes for it (whatever that means...something along the lines of beating a dead horse), trying to drag me down. Well, tomorrow is Easter, and the whole hope of all of my everything lies in the fact that Jesus Christ lived a perfect life on my behalf, died as an innocent and perfect sacrifice on my behalf, and rose again from the grave so that I, too, can live forever with Him in glory.  And I know all the right stuff about my sin, his righteousness, the forgiveness I have, and the Holy Spirit dwelling in me. And so, right now, I'm claiming all those things, again.  Because sometimes I have to do it once every thirty seconds, but darnit (really, that's not strong enough, but that's all I'll say on the internet), if that's what it takes, then that's what I'll do. Conquering death is no small thing.  Taking on the sins of the world, not so little either.  If God is big enough to do those things, then can I admit proclaim that He is big enough to change my heart?  Even if it is a little at a time?  Even if it's really hard and I don't want to sometimes?  Even if it feels impossible? Matthew 19:26 Jesus looked at them and said, "With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible." Philippians 4:13 I can do everything through him who gives me strength. There are so many other verses that are speaking to me right now, but those two are really standing out.  I hope all of you have a wonderful Easter Sunday.  In spite of difficulties, or pain, or sorrow, or hard times, or internal struggles, I pray that our eyes will be open to the true, deep, wonderful love of our Lord and Saviour, who with open arms calls us to Him.  Lord, increase our faith.

What Came First-the Chicken or the Egg?

If you're looking for major philosophical and existentially important discussion, then you have come to the right place. Tonight, the answer to the age-old question above is the egg.  An eggshell to be precise, and the chicken came afterward.  A few pieces of chicken, some of it raw.  These things were in my disposal and the disposal decided not to be at my disposal and therefore came the removal of the eggshell and the chicken, from the disposal. Putting my hand down the disposal comes pretty close to the top of my grody-things-that-I-never-want-to-do list (Grody?  Like, I totally grew up in the '80's, and it was rad; I have the big-bangs pictures to prove it.) so I was none too thrilled when I turned the disposal on and heard a pleasant little hum, but no moving parts or crunching up of food waste.  I turned the switch off, and stood there with my heart beating madly for a minute.  I wanted to run away, or cry, but I definitely did not want to stick my hand down there. Like I said, it's grody.  Gross, disgusting, foul, germ-filled, nasty, utterly revolting, and yucky.  Plus, what if it did some crazy mind-of-its-own thing and turned on?  I know the chances of that happening are pretty slim, but what if?  Huh?  That's scary, man.  I like my fingers on my hand, thank you. I finally put my hand down in there, and poked around, and turned the little food-grinders, and felt all around the sides for anything like a screw or some plastic or some other unfriendly disposal stopper-upper.  I came up with nothing.  But I did have my fingers. Bum-mer (I mean, I'm glad I have my fingers...bummer about non-functioning disposal).  I don't care so much about not having a disposal...we've lived without one before.  The tricky thing is to have a disposal, but not be able to use it.  I was so careful cleaning up after dinner not to get food in that side of the sink.  I was scraping plates into a plastic strawberry container in order to throw all of the scraps away; I was taken back to Camp where we had a scraper at the table every night who cleaned all the plates off before they were carted away for washing by Cabin # ___ (we took turns each day, for morning and evening meals, Cabins 1-6; I loved Cabin # 1). And just to throw in a little fun info, here's what else went wacky tonight... I decided to make a strawberry shortcake for after dinner because I had the strawberries, Mike likes that dessert, I also had the whipping cream, and Eliana was asleep so I thought I had the time.  That is a lot of good reasons (those are a lot of good reasons?) for making some shortcake.  With fresh strawberries.  And homemade whipped cream.  Mmmm. I got the shortcake ready (like a giant biscuit in a round cake pan) and stuck it in the oven with some potatoes, set the timer, and started working on the chicken I was doing for dinner.  I cooked the chicken first, not all the way, and then I sliced it so I could put it in a little butter and get it golden and delicious (I like to take food that is relatively low in fat and make it super-fattening, like cook it in butter or eat it with whipped cream made from...well, cream).  I did this (chicken in butter thing) recently twice, and the kids loved it.  I went to tell the kids it was time to switch turns on the computer, and came back and started rinsing strawberries.  Things were going so well!  The disposal thing had already happened but I was working around it.  Then I realized that I hadn't heard the timer yet, and I checked on the shortcake and it was burnt.  I took care of the bottom of that by cutting it off, and the rest was fine, but by the time I did all that, and turned the chicken off, it was dry.  Dry like a bone.  Like an old, old bone in the desert. I microwaved some great broccoli, though.  Do you know how I know?  Eliana ate it. I was fairly exasperated by the time we were supposed to eat.  Somehow we all made it through dinner, even though everyone (well, not Mike and Michaela-they're pretty normal) was in a bit of a mood.  And now my kitchen is mostly cleaned up and I am going to tackle the main bathroom we've been using.  That floor is in need of a serious can of you-know-what. Hey, I'm talking about Comet.  You know, that stuff that cleans so well. Because of your thirst for deep, intellectual, challenging, thought-provoking conversation, I'll leave you with this..."pasta" and "tapas" are made up of the same letters.  I noticed that the other day on the Pioneer Woman's website where she was talking about her favorite foods while living in L.A. Aren't you glad you stopped by?

All come from dust, and to dust all return. Eccl. 3:20b

The Bible teaches us that the Lord made man from the dust on the ground, and breathed life into his nostrils.  When Adam and Eve disobey, the punishment ends with this: "...for dust you are and to dust you will return." Before we moved into this house I was able to come over and sweep and mop the floors (I got part of the way done downstairs, but not all).  I was so excited because all of the floors I did do had very little dust on them, and the house had been empty for two weeks or so.  I thought,"Maybe this house gets less dusty than our house," which had people coming and going up and down the hallway every day.  Under the couch was getting very crowded-we had complaints. What I have discovered since we've been here for a couple of weeks now, however, is that it is us who makes the house dusty.  This may not be a revelation for most people.  Maybe I should not admit this out loud.  But it's me, and I like to do things like that.  I realized that the dust comes from us.  So, unfortunately, we will not escape the dustball-entrenched condition of our previous home(s). No, I just need to sweep more frequently.  Or give Eliana the broom...she does a great job.  Or Michaela and Eliana work well as a team.  And Christian loves to mop, so I need to get him busy, too. Great!  Now I have a game plan.  Because as long as we're living, we'll be "returning to dust." On the brighter side of things...

Psalm 103

Of David.

¹ Praise the LORD, O my soul; all my inmost being, praise his holy name. ² Praise the LORD, O my soul, and forget not all his benefits- ³ who forgives all your sins and heals all your diseases, ⁴ who redeems your life from the pit and crowns you with love and compassion, ⁵ who satisfies your desires with good things so that your youth is renewed like the eagle's. ⁶ The LORD works righteousness and justice for all the oppressed. ⁷ He made known his ways to Moses, his deeds to the people of Israel: ⁸ The LORD is compassionate and gracious, slow to anger, abounding in love. ⁹ He will not always accuse, nor will he harbor his anger forever; ¹⁰ he does not treat us as our sins deserve or repay us according to our iniquities. ¹¹ For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is his love for those who fear him; ¹² as far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us. ¹³ As a father has compassion on his children, so the LORD has compassion on those who fear him; ¹⁴ for he knows how we are formed, he remembers that we are dust. ¹⁵ As for man, his days are like grass, he flourishes like a flower of the field; ¹⁶ the wind blows over it and it is gone, and its place remembers it no more. ¹⁷ But from everlasting to everlasting the LORD's love is with those who fear him, and his righteousness with their children's children- ¹⁸ with those who keep his covenant and remember to obey his precepts. ¹⁹ The LORD has established his throne in heaven, and his kingdom rules over all. ²⁰ Praise the LORD, you his angels, you mighty ones who do his bidding, who obey his word. ²¹ Praise the LORD, all his heavenly hosts, you his servants who do his will. ²² Praise the LORD, all his works everywhere in his dominion. Praise the LORD, O my soul.

Little Goals, Big Picture

Today I started with one thing.  I looked around, and saw all that still needs to be done-the boxes, the cleaning, the everyday and routine stuff-and I thought,"I need to pick up one thing and put it away."  So I did. That one thing led to a couple more things, and then I started clearing off the table in the schoolroom.  It was heavy-laden. Eliana was asleep, Christian and Michaela were having some computer time, and it was just me and a quiet room that needed to be ordered.  I was busy, working steadily, accomplishing one thing at a time. I worked for about one hour, and realized that it was time to get ready for Christian's soccer game.  I felt good about what I had been able to put away, sort, or trash. When I went back through the room later this evening, I glanced at the table.  I could hardly tell that anything was gone of off the top even though I had unpacked two boxes, as well as returned an assortment of odds and ends to their proper places.  I felt so discouraged. I suppose I just can't do that, though.  I have to know that I did get something done, even if it doesn't look like it.  And then I have to keep on going.  I keep telling myself that eventually it will be great, when things are ordered and put away, and we're really moved in.  This process seems to take forever for us, but the truth is that the last three homes in which we lived, we were there for two years or less.  I almost feel like we never have had the chance to really settle.  We will be here for a while (as far as we know), so this could be the time that we get good and moved in! So, ask me in about six months or so how things are going, and I will have a very positive answer for you!  Six months sounds like a long time to some, but I think that is a good goal for us.  That way, if it's sooner, we will have some big-time celebrating to do!

The Way We Were

Everything seemed so important then...even laundry! I'm not going down that road again, no sir... Maybe Katie and Hubbell were best "the way they were" but this pile and I?  I cannot describe our past relationship as the best it could be.  We are going our separate ways.  It may be painful.  It may take some time.  But we will not be the way we were.  The best is yet to come!