A Mixed Bag

I have to be honest...tonight ended on a slightly sour note.  Things were going along just fine, and then all of a sudden, minutes before bedtime--KAPOW, BANG, KERPLUNK!  Something ugly got a hold of us, and I sent the kids to bed all in a hurry so that I could go start a load of laundry and shed a couple of tears and then be just fine.  (Sigh)

They are in the bedroom now, quietly talking, while I sit here thinking about my own struggles as I try to be a good example for them and fail each day at least one (hundred) time(s)...  and at the same time I am thinking about how for the last two weeks they have been listening non-stop to Christmas carols, reading about them in some very neat books we have about hymns, playing so nicely together (today, for hours), and cleaning up after themselves.  I love listening to them sing along with the carol CD.  It makes my heart swell when I hear their sweet voices sing things like,"While shepherds watched their flocks by night, all seated on the ground...The angel of the Lord came down, and glory shone around.  And glory shone around."  And if you could hear the lovely music in the background, the bagpipes and other instruments along with their voices, you would know why it affects me the way it does. 

So, there are these two sides, right?  The wonderful, grace-filled picture of the children (even Eliana will dance and move her arms so sweetly to the music) singing praises to our Lord.  The nasty, crazy ending to an otherwise very pleasant day which leaves a bad taste in my mouth and makes me want to eat a brownie to get rid of it.  This just leads me to affirm my belief that, indeed, I need a Savior, and praise the Lord, One has come. 

Advent...a season of preparing.  I'm going to go tell them that I love them.