The Toe Follies

Do you know how many times I have hit my toe against something, or one of the kids has stepped on it?  Fortunately the pain medication works so these incidents have not brought me to my knees.  But I am super jumpy lately. I have hit my toe on a bag hanging on the back of Eliana's stroller twice-once with the needle still in there and once after it had been removed.  The first time the bag had groceries in it, canned goods to be exact, and the second time the bag had library books in it.  It hurt. I have hit my toe on several table legs, including the table where I sit at the computer, and the table where we eat.  These are large tables.  I don't even sit close to the legs, but rather in the center of the tables.  My legs must be longer than I thought-whoopee! I have even hit my toe on a small chair that was under our dining room table.  Why was this small chair under the table?  Well, Michaela had a sore knee and she couldn't bend her leg and she put this chair under the table so that she could prop her leg up on it during dinner the other night.  I crossed my legs this morning while eating breakfast and hit the little chair right where my stitches are.  I then used my heel to shove gently push the chair out on the other side of the table.  I didn't say any bad words. Each one of my children has stepped on my injured toe, and not just once.  I have said the words,"Watch out for my toe!" so much that they only hear,"Whomp, whomp, whomp, whomp...whomp, whomp!"  I have learned to stand like a flamingo, and jump back and forth quite a bit.  I feel a little like Peter Stuyvesant trying to do the Bunny Hop. My toe has bumped into the tub while I'm bathing Eliana and it has bumped into the step onto which I am stepping. These things reveal what is seemingly a contradiction.  I can execute a move with such speed and precision that a needle will slide into the meaty part of my toe rather than under my toenail (I just heard at least one of you scream) or into my bone; then again, I can be so clumsy that no matter how hard I try not to or how careful I am, I will hit that same toe in that exact spot again and again, mostly on very large objects, while it is trying to heal.  I wish I could say that my toe was swollen to the size of a watermelon...that would give me an excuse.  No, the truth is I am a klutz.  Yet there are times that my klutziness is absolutely stunning. Mom, you must be so proud.

Comments

[Shannon]

Ouch! I have sympathy pain for you! Reading about the further injuries your poor toe has sustained made my toe hurt. I hope you heal quickly and without too many more bumps! ;-)

[jen]

Okay...don't laugh...but last summer, Mike got a big ol' honkin' splinter underneath his fingernail on his middle finger. He couldn't get it out with ANYTHING...it slid right in between that fleshy part and the nail and looked VERY painful (and he was in some severe pain).
We went to the doc and they had to numb it up and cut his nail back to pull it out! Ewww it gives me the heebie jeebies thinking about it. I only bring this up because you mentioned not having the needle slide under your toenail. Either way, your whole explanation of the events makes my blood curdle. :oX