A Free Ride

I feel pretty good about getting some things accomplished today.  Unfortunately they are the kinds of things that if someone showed up for a visit, said visitor would never know I had done a thing.  I cut down a million about forty boxes that have been hanging around for too long.  I also took them out to the recycling pile.  One small step for following through to the end of a project, one giant leap for Christina. I vacuumed a great deal of the house, and swept the dining room at least three times.  I also washed sheets today.  That takes a while...

I don't know why I would be putting this information out there for the world to see, considering several of the people who read this website don't even know me in real life, and just about everyone who reads my intriguing narratives (?!) lives in another state.  And it's just not worth the 10 or 18-hour drive to see the clean sheets on all our beds.  This stuff is so mortally mundane that only my mom might read it and get warm fuzzies.  

Furthermore, just because I'm so good at random, the kids made several forts today, got cornbread spread to the four corners of the earth throughout the entire dining room (but then they swept it up as a surprise for me which I have to say made me cry), I ran to CVS for milk tonight because I used it all up this morning making a double batch of pancakes, and on the way home I was like,"Man, I can't see; we have GOT to clean this windshield!" and then I realized that in addition to cleaning the dirty windshield I needed to turn my lights on which would probably help a lot, I finished off some brownies tonight, I haven't had a Coke in over a week (I confess to about three sips of the last 7-Up in our fridge several days ago, but it wasn't what I wanted and I didn't even finish it), I took two showers today because of how yucky I got at two separate times while taking a bunch of icky boxes out to the garbage, I now have a gigantic pile of laundry because of all the bathing that went on here today, there are two gnats flying around my computer on purpose to drive me insane.

Wanna come along?  Shotgun!

Mud Pies and Humble Pie

Around dinnertime things were not going so well here.  My two older children were in trouble for some bad behavior.  Eliana was eating, but all day she had been throwing temper tantrums; oh, yes, those here-come-the-two-year-old-temper-tantrums, screaming and yelling at me while flailing her body in all directions at once.  (How can babies turn into octopuses, squirmy messes, with arms and legs all over the place, that cannot be held?)  (I don't mean to offend any octopuses out there; sorry.)  I was thinking of the post I would put up later...kids for sale! it would just be pictures of the one fun time today, playing outside in a lot of mud.  I didn't have many good things to say, so I figured nothing said would be best.

I finally got to the point of putting Eliana to bed, which I have to say was a relief.  I gave the two big kids an order to find something quiet to do (how's that for direction), put Eliana in her own bed, and then lay down on mine (I know, this is a ritual that is going to come to an end soon, but I am not quite prepared for the hysteria of the ordeal...therefore, I stay with her until she is asleep, and rest my own eyes for a bit as well).  I could hear Michaela and Christian in our entry (a.k.a. the playroom) jumping rope.  Quietly!  Eventually, I didn't hear them anymore, so I was pleased that they had indeed gotten involved in some quiet activity.

Just as Eliana got very quiet and still herself I heard a knock on the door.  If I had high blood pressure, I would be in the hospital right now.  I closed my eyes and took a few deep breaths and hoped that whoever that was would come right to their senses and go away; the closed door while I'm putting Eliana to bed signifies NO ENTRY!  NO KNOCKING! Oh no, there was another little knock, and following that the door swung open.  I thought I was dreaming.  Christian peeked his head around the doorway and I calmly said something about how that was not helping me at the moment.  He tiptoed in the room and said, so seriously and gently,"Here is something I made for you because I love you."

And the parents police showed up and took me away in handcuffs so that I could serve a lifetime sentence for my crimes of insensitivity, selfishness, and general mom-slackery.

I took the piece of paper he handed me, and asked him to please go on out, and he and Eliana said sweet good nights.  I was worried that she would flip out, because she totally could have.  She didn't, though.  She lay back down and went on to sleep a few minutes later.  I looked at the paper Christian brought to me...

Translation:  When I went to the zoo I saw a girl jump-roping.  It was my sister.  I saw lots of animals!  I loved them!  Love Christian  To Mommy

He had written me a story, because he liked to write stories now, he said.  When I came out of the bedroom, there was another paper for me, and he went to work on a third while I read a bedtime story to him.  He can be so sweet.   Earlier today I felt so frustrated and admittedly angry when he stomped out of the house in a major huff because I wouldn't let them turn the hose on outside-I don't want them to have fun, right?  I put on a pointy little party hat, and called on the pity-party brigade to come on by and join me in my pouty shindig.  I felt like I was on the other end of that proverbial fair-weather-friendship (or mommying in this case)...when things are going their way, then I'm the greatest; if things are not all as they prescribe, then I'm the poster-child for Bad Moms 'R' Us.   There were other instances of give-mom-the-attitude, but we managed to make it to the end of the day intact.  In fact, there was at the end of the day this beautiful gesture, this precious act.  It leaves me speechless.  That's funny, isn't it, after I just wrote 20 paragraphs about the whole thing.

I'm just like everyone else in this family.  I want what I want, and I get fussy when I don't get it.  I have a lot to learn about parenting; being a mom at this point in our life together is very challenging.  I compare myself to other moms that I know, or that I read about online, and I think,"You just don't measure up!"  The truth is I don't measure up to a perfect standard, but I also don't have to be perfect.  I may have said this before, but I am an all-or-nothing kind of person.  If I can't do it perfectly, I want to (and usually do) quit.  The kicker is I want to do it perfectly with very little effort on my part.  These things don't make a good combination.  I am aware of these flaws; they are always before me.  A lot of the time I want to work to make a change, and sometimes I want everyone to go away and leave me alone.  Part of what I enjoy about writing most nights is I am able to look at my perspective and often make adjustments, or see things in a better light.  Of course, the kids are sleeping and now I can't tell them I'm sorry for my own bad attitude, or for not knowing the right thing to say at a particular moment and being snappy.  I can look at my day (week, month, year) and see so clearly that I am in need of patience, forbearance, and humility. 

Looking at those three words...they speak to me of how my God deals with me.  I can only pray that tomorrow will grant a fresh start.

Lamentations 3:21-23  (after contemplating affliction and bitterness, the writer has this to say...)

Yet this I call to mind and therefore I have hope: Because of the LORD's great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.

Well, here are the pictures I talked about so long ago, from outside in the mud.  They really did have a good time.  It's not my idea of fun, but I like to see them so happy. Eliana wrecking checking out the castles that her siblings constructed...

Some rain to wreak havoc on the castles, finishing off what Eliana started...

Delighted...

Can you imagine these fingernails?!

It started to sprinkle; I asked Eliana,"Where is the rain?"

There was also this moment I caught...the three of them singing "All Things Wise and Wonderful."

Eliana joined in with a little,"La, ah-ahh, ah, la, la, la..."

I think I'll go to bed with a smile on my face.

Where Have You Been All My Life?

We just bought a new toaster oven.  Mike did some research, ordered it, and it came in the mail a little while ago.  We (meaning he) finally got it out of the box and set up.  I had a pizza crust ready to go so I decided to make that for lunch. This is what I have to say about this machine... CUISINART, YOU ROCK THE CONVECTION TOASTER OVEN BROILER! I know that I have only had a brief relationship with this appliance, but just like a whirlwind romance that leads to a 60 year marriage after two weeks of love-at-first-sight courtship-when you know, you know. I really like our new oven.  It's so shiny.  And it preheated faster than I could walk from one end of the house to the other (okay, that's not a totally fair comparison...my healing toe slows things up a bit).  It cooked the pizza perfectly.  It seems to make a lot of sense the way the buttons work.  (It drives me bonkers when things look simple but turn out to be complicated.  I think that's the way Mike must have felt about me shortly after we got married.) So far, I'm in luuuv.  I will be relying heavily on the Cuisinart this summer.  I can toast bagels.  I can make nachos.  I can roast whole, small chickens (two at once!).  Not that I've EVER done that in my life in any oven, but I could.  If you're on the lookout for a new toaster oven that has bonus features, then this one gets a vote from me.  Thank you, Cuisinart!  You make me feel like an artiste de la cuisine!

A Load off of My Mind

Out with the old... in with the new... beautiful, functioning dishwasher! See those dishes in the sink?  They have been there a while...they are rinsed off, but with my toe I never quite finished all the dishes each night.  I tried to make sure there were bowls for in the morning (and then we ran out of milk!) and Eliana's cups got washed.  The first load is running now, though! Look at those green lights! It's a go! It doesn't sing Broadway show tunes, but I'm not handing out Tonys (Tonies?) here.  What's important is that I don't have to get all sweaty doing the dishes at night anymore.   And I can still have time for ice cream and a quick run through the house (because it looks like a bomb went off in here-namely two: "Little Man" and "Big Blue") and pick up trash and sleeping bags and dirty clothes (oh, I already did that one!) and more trash. There is a lot of paper strewn about...magazines, 3 x 5 cards (Hey, here's something really funny that is totally unrelated but because I am the kind of person who enjoys letting everyone know what an idiot I am I will share this.   I was looking on the keyboard for the symbol for "times" or "by" and of course it doesn't exist.   I was getting irritated...there is a plus sign, a minus sign, an equals sign, but no times.  I suddenly realized, however, that I could use the lower case x.  I am so smart.), torn up pieces of computer paper. Maybe it wasn't a bomb; maybe the paper aisle at Office Depot threw up in my living room. What does that have to do with a dishwasher?  Oh, yes, I have a little extra time tonight.  And speaking of time, aren't you glad you are spending your precious time reading such interesting stuff? Here is one more thing that has nothing to do with dishwashers but is actually interesting and fun.   Christian called out to me tonight that his tooth was hurting.   I told him to come here and asked him which one.   He showed me and I said,"Maybe it's loose. Wiggle it."  Sure enough, there was a little wiggle! I said,"Tell me how you feel about your loose tooth." He said,"GREAT!" I can't believe he's starting to lose his teeth.  My children are growing up, people!   They tell you that this is going to happen, but they can't really prepare you for the reality of it. I have a dishwasher again! Yay!

The Toe Follies

Do you know how many times I have hit my toe against something, or one of the kids has stepped on it?  Fortunately the pain medication works so these incidents have not brought me to my knees.  But I am super jumpy lately. I have hit my toe on a bag hanging on the back of Eliana's stroller twice-once with the needle still in there and once after it had been removed.  The first time the bag had groceries in it, canned goods to be exact, and the second time the bag had library books in it.  It hurt. I have hit my toe on several table legs, including the table where I sit at the computer, and the table where we eat.  These are large tables.  I don't even sit close to the legs, but rather in the center of the tables.  My legs must be longer than I thought-whoopee! I have even hit my toe on a small chair that was under our dining room table.  Why was this small chair under the table?  Well, Michaela had a sore knee and she couldn't bend her leg and she put this chair under the table so that she could prop her leg up on it during dinner the other night.  I crossed my legs this morning while eating breakfast and hit the little chair right where my stitches are.  I then used my heel to shove gently push the chair out on the other side of the table.  I didn't say any bad words. Each one of my children has stepped on my injured toe, and not just once.  I have said the words,"Watch out for my toe!" so much that they only hear,"Whomp, whomp, whomp, whomp...whomp, whomp!"  I have learned to stand like a flamingo, and jump back and forth quite a bit.  I feel a little like Peter Stuyvesant trying to do the Bunny Hop. My toe has bumped into the tub while I'm bathing Eliana and it has bumped into the step onto which I am stepping. These things reveal what is seemingly a contradiction.  I can execute a move with such speed and precision that a needle will slide into the meaty part of my toe rather than under my toenail (I just heard at least one of you scream) or into my bone; then again, I can be so clumsy that no matter how hard I try not to or how careful I am, I will hit that same toe in that exact spot again and again, mostly on very large objects, while it is trying to heal.  I wish I could say that my toe was swollen to the size of a watermelon...that would give me an excuse.  No, the truth is I am a klutz.  Yet there are times that my klutziness is absolutely stunning. Mom, you must be so proud.